Wednesday, November 16, 2005

Will you.....

Allow me to go all emo for the moment? It's just this once, I promise. I seldom emo. Really. And even when I do, I do it alone. As extroverted as I may seem, I'm a very private person.

So I'll emo for a while, okay? Don't hold it against me, please. It's just that when I'm sitting alone here at home on my last night in Kuching, I get a chance to type things that I seldom type.

So it begins here:

Why do you always seem so cold? Or maybe it's me? I keep asking myself if it's worth it, whether what I'm feeling is worth it. I've spent seven freakin' years on one person before, I'm not going to repeat the same mistake. I see you being oh-so-happy-friendly with everyone, but the moment I open my mouth to talk to you, I feel like I'm talking to a rock instead. A cold, hard rock. Why?

You. We had something good going there for awhile. There was a real chance of a normal, happy friendship. But you obviously got the wrong ideas. And now things are different. Can they please go back to those happy, teasing days? I miss those days. I promise I wouldn't go all D on you anymore. I don't like being a D either.

I miss you. I miss being able to talk to you on the phone for many crazy hours about goodness-knows-what. I do get to talk to you now, but it's so infrequent I grab onto any opportunity and treasure it, because talking to you has become such a rarity. And God knows seeing you is even more so.

You have been a part of my memory since my childhood. I can hardly find one memory that does not have you and our good times. I loved all the planning, the talking, the going-outs... and I particularly remember that Christmas when you playfully tried the Santa hat on me. What treasured moments.

And you, my friend, have never failed to make me laugh, and how I thank God for you. Those tough moments right at the beginning of last year? If you weren't around to do your goofy stunts over the phone to make me laugh, I don't know where I'd be today.

You, definitely rank right up there as one of the most reliable and amazing people I know. Your patience with helping someone who was as blurred-out at the keyboards like me was... well... let's just say I don't think I could do it if I were you. And thank you so much for that.

Oh, I'm sure that a good few of you guys would more or less be able to figure out who these people are.... who knows, I could even be referring to you!

Let's make this work, shall we? Life definitely needs to be made a lot less complicated.

Platonic friendships can and do exist, believe it or not. I have proof! *Gives baby a hug* Heh.

*Note: Baby can't read this because * does not read blogs. Ha. Unless they belong to *certain* people.... or unless certain people tell that I mentioned *!

But anyways, whatever it is, I seriously, seriously, do miss you, my newly-mobile friend.

Okay, emo time over! *Big grin*


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